One of the best reads about after the election blues was written by Garrison Keillor, whom I've always loved reading and listening to. Here he quotes what I feel:
"He will never be my president because he doesn't read books, can't write more than a sentence or two at a time, has no strong loyalties beyond himself, is more insular than any New Yorker I ever knew, and because I don't see anything admirable or honorable about him."
But for me and many others, life goes on. I will make every effort to live in denial for the next four years, burying myself in interior decorating, keeping my three dogs brushed and trying to convince people to go vegan. However, the glimpses of headlines don't escape even the most sincere person trying to live in political denial.
What bothers me the most are the day to day experiences. The headlines I can quickly skim over and pretend I didn't see them. But the other night I was at a Christmas party, I didn't know anyone except my husband. Most of the people there were conservatives who probably voted for Trump. Inwardly I prayed politics wouldn't come up, but it did.....I bit my tongue, smiled and patiently didn't say a thing. I was so good! Then, a very white lady with hair that looked like a brown puff that encased her head like a rain cloud spoke up. She had been talking and laughing and having a good ole' time the whole night. She obviously knew everyone there and on top of seeming pretty confident with her own personality, she won all the little Christmas games we played. She was on a role. I sat and smiled and asked the right questions you ask when you don't know people. The night was almost over, I felt triumphant that I held myself together and stayed carefully away from any topic that was controversial. I was ready to go. Then I heard this woman, with the brown rain cloud of hair, across from me, say, "Yeah, Trump's wall that he's going to put to separate "Brown Town from Arizona."
I was in total dismay. It was clear that's what she said. "Brown Town"....."Trump's Wall" .....and "Separate". However it was "Brown Town" that shocked me. I was aghast! I looked around, wide eyed and wondering in dismay if anyone else heard what I had heard. More importantly, what was their reaction. Nothing. All was as 'normal' as it had been all night. Except of course for my reaction.
My sweet little, politically correct smiling face probably turned a bright shade of green; sick and angry green. I still didn't say a thing. I wanted to, but I think I was too stunned. I turned and looked at the woman next to me whom I hadn't said much to. I just looked her in the eyes...my eyes wide and wondering, hoping for some sort of consoling eye contact of non verbal assurance... but her eyes were emotionless, maybe even wondering why my look was desperate. I couldn't read her. I just shook my head and turned and stared at this rude, in my opinion, racist, woman, with the brown, cloud puffy hair. I stared daggers. I wanted to say something but didn't want to embarrass my husband, so I just stared a stare that was as thick as smoke from a burning building. I actually wanted to say something like, "What the hell did you just say???" I almost didn't care if I embarrassed him or not.
I whispered in a not so low voice tone to my husband, "Did you just hear what that woman said?" He replied that he didn't think it was the way it sounded. I disagreed. How can "Brown Town" mean anything else? Bitch!
Okay, so yet again, I digress. The whole point of this story is that this is what Trump's America looks like, sounds like. Racism without shame. Like getting totally naked in front of everyone and telling them to F---off...they'll do it if they want to...it's their right. But the blatant racism that Trump has encouraged is actually worse than that. Being naked is about only you. But baring your pure, unadulterated racism is what is happening now.
The thing that is scarier than racism gone wild is his ignorance. His ability to get us into a major war is very real. He spoke with Taiwan; something no president has done for over 40 years, with good reason. Of course this pissed China off. I won't even touch the fact that this selfish narcissist with serious attention deficit disorder, will totally put our national security at risk.
People who are okay with this porn advocate say that we shouldn't let politics divide us. I say, "why not?" People that enabled him to be president by either voting for him or doing a write in vote have morals and a basic value system so entirely different from mine that I don't see any point to continue to associate myself with them. And these same people have a difficult time quoting his own words of being a proud pussy grabber: "grab 'em by the pussy".
About fifteen years ago I had a dream. A real dream. I dreamed that I was a fly on the wall in a small apartment. There were two men in the room. An Asian looking guy and an Middle Eastern looking guy. In the middle of this small, drab apartment was a little card table with a table cloth over it that reached the floor. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. The Asian guy sort of panicked and motioned for the other guy to quickly get under the table. As the Asian guy opened the door there were police that stormed in looking all around. They had guns in their hands and didn't look like they knew much about mercy or grace. They looked like they were passionately doing their job. They looked all around and then left. I woke up and the thought went across my mind, "Would you hide a Muslim the way some hid Jews?" This was fifteen years ago. I believe it was a God thing....a God dream. This was probably a prophetic dream about Trump's America. I now wear a safety pin on all that wear to show that I am a safe place for all that Trump will try to oppress, for all that Trump will not defend.
I am still very upset, very sad and I grieve. I grieve for the great America that we're slowly turning into. The white dream that we are a Christian nation is not true. I don't believe what I was once taught. Christ did not teach what I learned in the '50's and '60's. They were lies.
Okay, rant done, sort of, for now. I'll end with Dave singing what my heart feels. I do hope you listen!
It is too sad and surreal
ReplyDeletePeggy, I feel for your experience--it has not reached me personally yet, but my very dear friend Cher Jey was accosted on the Chicago Transit Authority this afternoon, and two African-American men came to her assistance. But the IDEA that a black woman traveling to pick up her son from school offers a 'target' that Trump's actions, and the GOP's tacit approval of them, allows her to be 'fair game' is disgusting in the extreme. I will continue to do what I have always done--speak out against normalizing of bigotry, misogyny, the EVILS of capitalism, and the extremism of 'christians' who've stopped BEING Christian. Please don't stay away too long, or, if you do, please email me to 'talk'. Blessings, always.
ReplyDeleteI don't have a God to pray to, I tooo fucking hate this man. I can only hope our fellow man won't let him run unchecked xxx
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