I Wanna Pack My Bags and Take a Boat to The End of The World

I have this uncanny ability to know when something bleak is going to happen. As you can imagine, it's not a competency that I enjoy or welcome.






 My heart has been heavy ever since the election.






Even in my own personal life things have been a little bit of a struggle from a first world perspective.  But the atmosphere in our country is more disturbing; it's darker than I've felt for a long time.




 I'm trying to keep my head above the proverbial tumultuous waters of our time.  It feels like the Viet Nam era where controversy and borderline despondency was felt all the time; every time you turned on the news.



Some however, are celebrating the fact that Obama is no longer in power, and the same group of people are enthusiastic and hopeful of....of.....honestly, I'm not sure what they are hopeful for with this administration.  Perhaps they think we will soon have a financially profitable America that will take them back to a seemingly more prosperous time.  Maybe it's the Christian Right that seems to think that if we ban abortion, ban same sex marriages and ban anything else they perceive as immoral,  God will bless America.  Maybe they're jubilant because they feel if we shut our doors to the tired, the hungry and poor we will be a safer nation, a more prosperous nation.



The trouble is that I do have an idea why some are pleased Trump is our new leader and they are all listed above.  Elections and new presidents are not supposed to divide families and friends, but it does.  It has.    But I have to say the division is on the opposition as well. Not seeing that this man is closing doors, building walls, and promoting hate is incomprehensible.  As a Christian I believe closing our doors to the type of people this new administration is singling out is hard- hearted and detached from anything Christ taught.

What do I want to do?





 I wanna  "pack my bags and get a boat to the end of the world" .  I love that Dave always has  a song that will sing my soul's inaudible words.

Love Not Hate Will Make America Great...My New Slogan...Wish Me Luck

It's been a rough time lately. The election and new leader of the free world has brought a lot out in me that I don't like. And.....







...........I have allowed it to be a grey cloud that hovers over my existence.  I think it's time for change.




I remember going through a time of soul searching years ago and deciding that I didn't' want to be the hateful, angry person I had been. Sort of like now. That angry person seems to be resurrecting and showing her ugly, painful, hurt self. Again, I will do some soul searching and then decide how to go about change; how to continue to move towards love.





I went to the Women's March in my city yesterday.  It wasn't a march of victory or even much of a protest, just a march trying to show solidarity that what has made America great is love, not the absence of love.  You can be against something, but show love. When the Viet Nam Vets came home in the 60's and 70's, they were not greeted well because of anti war protests.  It hurt our country more than helped.  We vowed we would never do it again.

I heard a slogan that was continually chanted yesterday, "Love not hate will make America great".  It keeps going over and over in my mind.  Good thing the power of words!! I made a decision those words will take precedence in my mind for the next four years.  I've put too many negative things out there that  come back to haunt and mainly hurt me.  But, I still believe and stand by what I put out there,  as odd as it may seem.   Feeling betrayed by my own "religion" is something I can't shake. I used to go to this amazing counselor and after pouring my heart out  about an issue, she would usually say, "And what can you learn about yourself with this?"  Again, I will ask myself this, and perhaps there will be change for the better deep inside my very core.



Maybe I'm finished trying to save the world, or even finished trying to make a difference.








Maybe I should do what Garrison Keelor suggested so many might do for the next four years; "Grow heirloom tomatoes" and busy myself with hobbies, doing the best I can at work, and loving my family; both humans and four legged members.

I've read posts saying things like, "Get over it, we won " and "I'm tired of hearing you're not happy with the results" .  I guess I'll take the hint.  I'll quit trying to explain why a lot of the world is perplexed that we have chosen such a man for president. Maybe, just maybe, I should even hope for the best.  (That's gonna be a challenge!!)



In the meantime I have no regrets about what I've said or done. What I posted  were things the new president had said, or pictures of his wife posing nude about ten years ago.  In my defense, I said nothing about whether posing nude is wrong or right. I just basically said that this is our new first lady.  People thought my post  was tacky, and perhaps they were right.  It was tacky, but it is who she was.  And one last word in my defense, if Michelle Obama had done it,  not one of the people who told me they thought it was tacky would have come to Ms. Obama's defense about tackiness. They would have been silent and let it grow like cancer; and it most definite would have. (Thank you Ms. Obama, for being a gracious, strong lady if integrity!!)






I really am not sure how much longer I have here on earth. Maybe twenty years, Maybe more, maybe less.  I remember one of the last things I heard my dad say was, "I have about ten or fifteen more years left" and five days later he died of a massive heart attack.  One of my goals is to die at peace with myself without using any masks, addictions or spurious support systems.







 My little sister is a wonderful example of moving towards peace yet not compromising her convictions about love and what is good, lovely, peaceful and worth meditating on.  Good job Sherry!!

So, wish me luck with my new challenge.  Wish me luck filtering my own thoughts and using discipline, and wish me luck that if nothing else, I will be able to spread a little compassion, love and even hopefulness. Thanks for reading this to the end...xoxoxo

Dear President Obama,

I couldn't watch tonight because I would have cried.  Instead I got into a pissing match (excuse the pun in light of the 'breaking' news) with some guy who posted something on my facebook page defending Trump's insanity.

Anyway, thank you so much for all you did for our country.  Thank you for creating jobs. I remember when you took office things were going downhill fast in this country.  Small businesses were shutting their doors, and even some large corporate owned were laying off way too many people. One of them was my son in law, along with thousands of others who worked for the same corporation.  It was very weird and the whole country had a truly depressed feeling.  You changed that.  Now, house prices have risen back up to almost what they were before the crash, employment is way up, and derelict buildings are now places of business.  If anyone made America great, you did.

And your most beautiful, dignified wife?  I'm just so sad she will be replaced by a soft porn star.  How can that be?  I feel like I now live in Biff Tanen's Hill Valley where every one is hard- hearted and corrupt. But back to your wife Michelle.  I'm so grateful for her and her strength. She was and is such a role model for young girls.  She has beauty, dignity and integrity.  She will be most sadly missed.  I hear the new "first lady" (UG...I don't even like calling her that.) doesn't even want to live in the White House.  Her husband is a billionaire and she probably isn't used to real class.  Oh well....

I know you spoke about being hopeful, positive, and getting out and doing something if we want change.  That sounds all fine and good, but I'm old and done. I don't have the energy anymore. And frankly, I'm worried that it won't matter anyway.  The best thing I believe that I can do is just try to stay peaceful and respectful. It's really easy for me to get angry and go over the edge. Not that I have no control; I choose to go there, and that's not who I want to be.

So for the next four years I'll just decorate, continue to try and lose weight, and be thankful I have a stay at home job which I love.  I loved you and your family Mr. President, and am so very sorry you will not be able to stay.  You did the best job of any president I've ever experienced, and I'm 60 something.  Your legacy will be amazing.  Especially to people who value peace, justice, equality and freedom.

God bless and keep you and your family.

Peggy