I can't tell you how much I think of you. It's crazy. I think of you so many times a day. I can't pass that little fountain where you died without feeling horrible. It's so empty without you. People don't understand what it's like. I am told by my more sensitive friends that maybe you're still hanging around. I wish I could feel that more. I wish there was something more tangible between here and there.
I ache to have you here and to hold your little fluffy self. I cry alone, I see your face all the time, and I feel like so f(*king failed you. I wish I could do so much over. There was the cutest dog I almost adopted, but I started thinking about how high maintenance your brother Milo and your sister Tasha is and I had to decide against it. Also, if I would have adopted her, it would only have been because I was looking to replace you and our relationship. Nothing will ever do that. And when I realized that, I sort of broke down. You were with me so long. We would take trips from Kansas City to Springfield together. You were a fantastic travelling partner. God knows how much I miss you.
I love you Lex, and I miss you like crazy...really I do! There are no words to describe the ache. I would take you and hold when you were so old and I would stroke your old body and you knew. You knew the bond and I believe you felt the same as I did.
I hope God has a special place for souls like yours. I miss you so much!
Your human,
Peggy
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