Probably 20 minutes later, as I was dozing off a loud crash caused me to sit up faster than I could say "what's that?" I thought maybe someone tried to get in the house by breaking our glass patio door. Phil said the cat might have knocked down our glass lamp in the living room. On the way downstairs we saw the source of the crash. A mirror about five feet long and four feet high had slid down the wall, toppled over and shards of mirror were all over the couch.
The back of the mirror was facing the ceiling as it was lying on the couch. The top part of the mirror had hit the coffee table and caused it to slide a bit. I was concerned about my computer which had been on the coffee table. I didn't think it could have survived the accident, but there it was. It had fallen off the table and onto the floor. I figured the screen was probably shattered but when I opened it, it was all in one piece....thank God! Computers are expensive.
Then it occurred to me that I could have been on the couch, that I WOULD have been on that couch had I decided to go with plan A for the night. I couldn't shake the thought and knew that God probably sent his angels to hold the mirror up until I was gone. The mirror had been on that wall for almost five months without a problem. We checked the screw the mirror was hanging from and it was still tight with no signs of failing.It was the frame that the wire for holding it up was attached to that broke. Phil and I have no idea why, last night, it decided to break. There doesn't seem to be a logical reason. If you have any ideas, please feel welcome to share them with me.
I couldnt stop thinking about how my life would have been different had I stayed on the couch. Perhaps I would have been killed. As I surveyed the damages the sharp broken glass made me wonder. All of the pieces; big, medium sized and small looked like knives. I wondered how the leather couch was underneath the edges and points of broken mirror. Fortunately there were no rips.
Both Phil and I were processing it all, saying things like, "Oh my dear God, dear God!!! And of course I said "thank you God" more than a few times. Did you ever see the movie "Sliding Doors" with Gwenth Paltrow? I kept thinking of that.
"'Sliding Doors', is a great look at how quickly a person's life can change in a matter of moments. By taking one path instead of another, forming a tantalizing 'what if?' In fact this movie gives the impression that some things are meant to be known, while some things are not." (quote from IMDb moving internet review site)
Well, for about an hour I kept thinking about the "what if". I could almost see me lying there on the couch as the accident happened.(The next few sentences are not for those who feel faint at the sight of blood and gore.) I saw the shards of glass. But instead of being all over the couch, they were all over ME on the couch. They were stuck in my body in some places and other places lying on my body. The wooden edge of the mirror left my lying there, blood pouring out of me in so many parts of my poor, broken body, probably unconscious...(Although Phil really thinks I would have been aware and screaming and that would have caused him to wake up. I think he would have slept through the whole thing. And if the accident didn't kill me, loss of blood would have because he would have slept through the whole ordeal. Just my thoughts.) The thought did occur to me, by the way the glass broke as it landed on the couch, that one of those knife-like pieces could have just cut my jugular.
Phil and I just sort of sat there in a daze for a few minutes and took it all in. We decided to clean up in the morning as the mirror frame was pretty heavy and it would take longer than the usual clean up. Back in bed I kept seeing the "me" if I would have made the choice to stay on the couch. At one point I imagined, "Maybe this is a near death experience...or maybe I'm really dead. Maybe I'm really lying in a hopital somewhere and I'm dreaming that I'm okay." You know, it's like "is this a dream, or is the dream dreaming us."
If I am in a dream, this is my main dream and I'm okay and I'm convinced that God sent angels to help me. I'm convinced there are probably so many moments like these in our lives where God has protected us and most of the time we don't even have a clue. You know, the auto accidents that could have been, the downed airplanes that missed tragedy by someone's choice to go back and check that thing that didn't seem right. Whatever, I am convinced that I am loved, and for the most part, protected (until it's my time to die) by a good and loving God who has not only his son, but minions of angels who are good, and who help.
I also realize that some people do have tragedies and wonder why. I too wonder why. These are the mysteries we'll never figure out in this life. I wish I knew.
I am so grateful. I am grateful that I'm alive. I am grateful that glass didn't rip through my body last night and cause me an undue amount of pain. Saying that, I'm off to the gym to take care of this body that is whole, uncut and serves me well. Thanks be to God!
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