Sticking My Head In the Oven...(you know what I mean)

 Stress:  a physical, chemical, or emotional factor that causes bodily or mental tension and may be a factor in disease causation


Ummmm..yeah!  That is what has been going on for the last two weeks.  Even the owner of my gym said I seemed "off" lately.  Off? Wow..she was gracious! "You seem like a BITCH lately" would be a more realistic way of putting it.  Like I said, she was gracious! 


So, I have  a lot of responsibility at my job lately and it will be over in a little over a week. Not my job, (hopefully) but this special element in my job that seems to be causing this stress.  




My administrators have put me in charge of a very important and highly confidential matter: state testing for students in another city. I am an old hippy, we do not like responsibility.  



I also have a lot of "artist" in me.  Which means I see the big picture.  Forget the details, just get the picture finished and express yourself is the way I do it.   However, this task that I am responsible for is not about anything other than a technical "to do list" and don't forget to make sure the students don't color outside of the bubble.  OIY!   

Yet for some reason the people I work for have the idea that I am very responsible and capable of doing the assigned task. Although there is a hippy side to me, and an artist side to me, there is this other side that has been buried for God knows how many years That other side of me really does like responsibility and really does enjoy travelling and really does enjoy a new adventure: at least I think she's in there somewhere.  


To make matters worse, I have a friend I work with who is so disgustingly cheerful and confident that it annoys the hell out of me. I even told her how annoying she is.  I hate that I did that, and even more, I hate it that I meant what I said!  Of course it didn't phase her, she just smiled and continued to talk about how perfect her life was, 
and how much she loved her boyfriend , (I got them together!!!) how much he loves her and how much fun she is going to have when she goes to her location which is eight hours away...I would HATE that...my location is half that distance.  I remember once, a long time ago, I was a chaperone on a youth trip with the church that I was attending.  A young girl and I were talking about how cheerful so and so was and she just said matter of factly, "I don't like happy people."  I know it sounds harsh, but I immediately laughed and told her I didn't either.   


Don't get me wrong, I wish happiness on most people.  But incessantly cheerful???  

Come on!  

Anyway, I'll stop with that right there. But for now, I will try my best to manage this stress and say all sorts of affirmations to myself.  You know the ones:  "I can do it", 




"I'm good enough, and smart enough and dog gone it, people like me". 

Those! 

I will also try extra hard not to take my stress out on the people closest to me.  


And maybe, just maybe I can order the new Sophie Kinsella book and pay extra for the one day delivery so that I will be able to have a fun escape after a full day of parents, students, and testing. I may also have a full bodied red to cuddle up with in my hotel room as I read the mindless book.

So for now dear readers..If you pray, pray for me, or if you don't pray, send good thoughts to me so that I don't break and totally do something I will regret. Love to you!!!